The nether-zone

The nether-zone. We’re in the thick of the nether-zone. Those days between Christmas and New Year when you can be forgiven for not knowing which day of the week it is. Today is the sixth day of Christmas - the one where somebody’s true love started bringing them geese, utter chaos. Nowadays we have terms such as ‘love-bombing’ and ‘red-flags’ to dissuade such behaviour.

We’ve kept it light this week, because we know there’s not a lot of work done in the nether-zone (and our boss said we can clock off for New Year once we’re finished). However, as our gift to you - double questions on the quiz this week to help keep your Teams status ‘active’, enjoy!

MARKETS

Data: Google Finance, 5-day Market Close

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PROJECT WATCH

🏗️ Offshore wind: East Anglia Three set for pre-construction work in early Jan Read more

🌊 Harbour Energy confirm North Sea hydrocarbons discovery. Read more

💉 Final preparations on test for first UK carbon capture (CO2 injection) in North Sea. Read more

ECONOMY & FINANCE

Economy stuck in neutral
Britain’s economy is doing its best impression of a parked car, with official figures confirming precisely zero growth in the third quarter of 2024. The Office for National Statistics (ONS) initially estimated a meagre 0.1% rise in GDP for July to September but has now decided, in the spirit of last-minute Christmas Grinchery, to round that down to nothing. Bah, humbug.

To make matters worse—or "the worst of all worlds", as Investec’s Philip Shaw put it—the economy is limping just enough to avoid a full-blown recession, but not enough to inspire even a flicker of optimism. Sure, consumer spending and business investments are holding up, but weak export demand and jittery markets are putting paid to any festive cheer. A drizzle in the economic forecast? More like steady December rain.

Boxing Day goes non-contact
Boxing Day shopping on the High Street has taken a nosedive, much like your gym routine this month. Data from MRI Software shows a 6.2% drop in footfall compared to 2023. Clearly, the lure of online bargains – and not having to wrestle a screaming toddler for the last half-price kettle – is proving too strong for many.

Some big-name retailers, including John Lewis, M&S, and Next, decided to sit out this year’s Boxing Day frenzy, keeping the lights off and the tills silent in favour of giving staff a much-needed break - nothing to do with rising energy costs and hefty Bank Holiday overtime rates?

Barclays estimated Brits will drop £4.6bn in total Boxing Day spending this year, most of it online - still just a smidge down from last year’s £4.7bn. It’s more a matter of convenience. With 63.9% of purchases happening online last year, Boxing Day sales are becoming a non-contact sport.

POLITICS

Membership Wars
Nigel Farage’s Reform UK claims its membership has surpassed the Conservative Party’s, crossing 150,000 according to its online ticker. Tory leader Kemi Badenoch dismissed the figure as “fake”, accusing Farage of using an automated counter to inflate numbers. Farage hit back, threatening legal action if Badenoch doesn’t apologise. Farage invited a ‘big-four’ auditor to verify Reform’s numbers—on the condition that the Tories do the same.

Starmer’s Growth Gamble
Sir Keir Starmer is calling on UK regulators to serve up their best ideas for boosting economic growth. In a pre-Christmas letter to watchdogs like Ofgem and Ofwat, Starmer, Chancellor Rachel Reeves, and Business Secretary Jonathan Reynolds requested proposals by mid-January to help create a "pro-growth and pro-investment" regulatory environment. With the UK economy flatlining between July and September, it’s all hands on deck to meet Labour’s lofty goal of leading the G7 in sustained growth.

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ACROSS THE POND

Donald’s Christmas wish list
In a festive display of geopolitical ambition, President-elect Donald Trump embraced the giving spirit by proposing the United States take charge of Canada, Greenland, and the Panama Canal, via a string of Truth Social posts on Christmas Day. Trump, beaming with a Santa-sized sack of ideas, hinted at acquisition moves reminiscent of monopoly players eyeing their favourite properties.

Canada: Mr Trump suggested the Prime Minister try the role of "governor" instead, hinting Canada might be happier as a US state - promising taxes would reduce 60% for Canadians.

Greenland: Once again proposing the US buy the icy protégé from Denmark in order for a military base to bolster their national security — an idea initially thawed out during his first term. Mute Egede, Greenland's Prime Minister, remains as firm as a Christmas pudding on Boxing Day, resolute in his island not being for sale.

Panama Canal: The US finished building the canal in 1904, it is a canal that cuts through North America, opening trade routes. Donald inferred modern Chinese influence on the controlling of the Panama Canal and insisted the US should take control. Panama's President has dismissed the notion of playing pass the parcel with the canal, underscoring their independence, while dismissing suggestions of Chinese influence navigating its waters.

TECH

The sun’s hottest visitor
NASA’s Parker Solar Probe has flown closer to the sun than any spacecraft in history. On Christmas Eve, it came within 3.8 million miles of the solar surface, racing at a blistering 430,000 mph and surviving temperatures nearing 1,000°C. Not bad for a festive outing. The probe is on a mission to unravel the mysteries of our fiery star, from why its corona burns hotter than the surface to the origins of solar wind.

The Parker team received a reassuring signal on Boxing Day, confirming the spacecraft is alive and well. Detailed data is set to arrive on New Year’s Day, giving scientists—and us—a cosmic resolution to kick off 2025. It’s a reminder that while humanity wrestles with earthly crises, our exploration of the heavens continues. Speaking of crises, let’s talk AI.

Apocalypse Now, or later?
As NASA peers into the heart of the sun, some experts are peering nervously into humanity’s future. Geoffrey Hinton, the "Godfather of AI", now warns there’s a 10–20% chance artificial intelligence could lead to human extinction within 30 years.

But not everyone’s reaching for the panic button. Meta’s AI chief argues AI could save us from extinction rather than cause it. Still, with technology evolving faster than you’ll regift that Lynx smelly set, Hinton’s concerns feel less like science fiction and more like a ticking clock. As we unlock the secrets of the universe with spacecraft like Parker, the bigger question looms: will we survive long enough to enjoy the answers?

WORLD

Mining for trouble
El Salvador has ditched its metals mining ban, believing their environmental laws needed a little shimmer, unlocking gold deposits President Bukele claims are worth $132bn. Environmentalists aren’t buying it, warning the move will poison water, soil, and biodiversity. Bukele says it’s “God-given wealth”, but critics argue the cost to the country’s fragile ecosystem could make it fool’s gold.

Russia mops up a mess slicker than Putin’s PR
A storm in the Kerch Strait left two tankers stranded, spilling nearly 40% of their 9,200 tonnes of fuel oil into the Black Sea. Thousands of volunteers are scrubbing furiously, but Crimea is drowning in more than just bad press. Kremlin officials admit the ecological damage is “critical”. Crimea has declared a state of emergency, though experts warn the long-term impact may prove harder to wash away than the oil.

Impeachment season
South Korea’s political turmoil has reached new depths as lawmakers impeached acting president Han Duck-soo, just weeks after impeaching President Yoon Suk Yeol. Han, who took over following Yoon’s ousting over a brief martial law imposition, was removed in a 192-0 vote by the opposition-led National Assembly.

QUIZ TIME

There’s still tea in the pot...
The Teapot weekly quiz

Cuppa Chat: Cheat Sheet

♟️👖 Grandmaster Magnus Carlsen resigned from the Fide World Rapid and Blitz Chess Championships after being told he couldn't continue playing in jeans and refused to change.

📻🌊 BBC Radio 4 will celebrate the 100th anniversary of The Shipping Forecast with readings from famous voices like Nessa from "Gavin and Stacey" on New Year's Day.

🎱🇭🇰 World No. 1 snooker player Judd Trump joins fellow snooker star Ronnie O'Sullivan to become a Hong Kong resident.

🐌🌿 Over 1,300 Desertas Island land snails, previously thought extinct, have been released into the wild after a successful UK breeding programme at Chester Zoo. These snails, endemic to Madeira, are now marked with infra-red paint for monitoring.

📮👴 Robert Hudson, 76, Britain's longest-serving Royal Mail postman, retires after 60 years of service.

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